Sunday, November 1, 2015


As Halloween comes to an end and the Christmas season begins, the jack-o-lanterns, spider webs, ghosts and monsters will inevitably disappear into our attics and quickly be replaced with glistening snow, x-mas trees, eggnog and mall Santas...

...screaming children on the laps of costumed strangers is one of the hallmarks of the Christmas season after all... and Halloween too I suppose.  Too bad we can't just scare children for fun all year round.

But if you were a one of the unfortunate children of 1975 who had parents that didn't love them or were on some fucked up drugs, you could have continued the age old tradition of being terrorized during the holidays in your very own home, with... 

...HUGO : Man Of A Thousand Faces

"...yes Billy, the police will never find out who really murdered your family."
Released by Kenner in the 1970's before their success with the Star Wars action figure franchise, HUGO was a bald plastisol puppet with the cold stare of a serial killer. It's main feature was the ability to change into different disguises utilizing various face attachments such as facial hair, scars, warts, eye patches, fangs... you know, all the stuff normal people have on their faces.

The disguise attachments were applied using some kind of glue, which I'm sure was tons of fun to clean off after multiple uses. What child wouldn't want a soulless puppet with white goo on his face to play with alone in their bedrooms? Try not to make a mess kids!

HUGO hasn't glared at little children from toy store shelves for over forty years, but if you are a good little bastard, Satan... I mean Santa, just might track one down on eBay and drop it off at your miserable house so that you too can experience the terror for yourself.

Speaking of puppets and sticky white goo - did you know that HUGO helped Pee-wee Herman hypnotize women to take their clothes off on his live stand-up comedy show back in the 80's? No wonder Pee-wee's Playhouse was so fucking insane. Don't let the silly humor fool you. Under the guise of 'Dr. Mondo', HUGO has gained complete control over Pee-wee's child-like mind...

. . .

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